Its easy to say I felt a weight off my shoulders by finally creating this blog yesterday. I’ve been itching for an outlet, and yet I do have a type of journal.
These are awesome for their own reason. Its nice to see how one answers things differently as each year goes by. However, for the deep stuff, the venting, the laughter, and stories? No, this journal is not for that. This past year I had a terrible sense of loneliness. Although I had my friends, its worth mentioning that they also were 50 minutes away from me. Now as a still 20 something; happy hour still consists of cocktails. Halloween parties would be over an hour away, couples date night is an hour away. Well, I’m sure you get the picture.
I think with any form of sadness its nice to know you’re not alone. It doesn’t matter if its a like, comment, or view; its the knowing that someone might get it.
Right now we are facing Winter Storm Chester coming our way. Supposedly we are getting 8+ inches of snow. Chester has created a problem for me. My mother is due to have chemo tomorrow. The snow will be arriving in the morning. Chemo is at 10. Crap crap crap. I told my Mom this is clearly a problem. Eli is working, kids have school, school could be cancelled, school may not happen at all. UGGGGHHH! The crisis was averted when it was sorted out that chemo could happen Wednesday instead. WRONG! SO WRONG! Mi madre calls back: “Um, the news says not to count on kids having school on Wednesday. What are we going to do?”
I now feel like this. What do you MEAN what will we do!? Obviously my mother does not have anyone as a back up plan. I have diligently taken her to every chemo, so she has had no need for a back up person. I start going down a list of her friends. Somehow, no one is available. Eli insists I could do it tomorrow and take our Denali. Wonderful! Oh wait I hate driving in snow and would be driving in the thick of the storm through hills. That is NOT going to happen. The solution to this as of now is calling the cancer center and seeing if this can somehow be postponed. See what just happened there? Vent. Over.